The concept quality of life has caused a lot of chaos in my actual life and, if you are anything like me, probably yours too.
I will go further to state that I’ve come to believe there are no more dangerous words strung together these three: quality of life.
This may be surprising or confusing to you.
Let me explain:
Quality of life is a standard level of various domains in one’s life that consists of the expectations of an individual or society for a good life. These expectations are guided by the values, goals and socio-cultural context in which an individual lives.
The general idea is that you were born into a certain culture, and according to how well you align with the expectations that your particular society has determined as a ‘good life’, you will be deemed to have a high or low quality of life.
So if your personal values and goals are in perfect alignment with the society in which you grew up in, you are in luck! There is still a chance for your life to be measured as that of ‘high quality’. Unless, of course, you do not meet other social or economic standards, as set out and determined by professionals.
Why does this matter? What difference does it make?
It matters because a group of well-intentioned individuals have predetermined that due to external criteria you have no control over, you are fated to have a ‘low’ or ‘high’ quality of life. It matters because this type of messaging being drummed into our heads every day leads to immense suffering.
For, right at the cusp of a new decade, what are the values and goals of the globalized society in which we find ourselves in?
Status. Productivity. Wealth. Length of years alive on this Earth. Health, according to the measurements of experts.
It is time we take a very good look at the ways in which we measure a life well lived, because these messages are lethal.
Our society is currently experiencing a mental health epidemic. Rates of anxiety, depression, suicide, addiction and chronic illness are rapidly rising.
My students often believe that they are failing some arbitrary measurement that has lasted well beyond its due date. There is no way to succeed in a society that demands more, no matter how much one has. It is a rigged game and leads directly to mental health challenges.
Of course, measures related to quality of life are integral for many reasons. There are certainly some things humans require to exist on this Earth, such as food, water and shelter.
But how many of us have more than enough of these material resources, yet are quite literally dying of stress or loneliness?
It is of the utmost importance for us to rethink what we are teaching our children to be valued, and consider emphasizing attributes of kindness, compassion, connection and love.
We must stop measuring our worth according to a scientific scale that only tells a fraction of the story. We must stop telling ourselves these stories of victimization and comparing ourselves to one another in judgmental ways.
I have no resolutions for the new year. However, my intention is to be a small part of the envisioning of this new scale we create together. I hope to teach my students and clients how to create their own models of success, based on their unique values and needs. I believe that together we can transform ourselves individually and on a societal level from victims to survivors.